Tag: dad

The cool Dad..

I’m not lying to you when I tell you that my favorite television show is a cartoon on Disney Junior called Bluey. The show is about a family of Australian blue heeler dogs and their adventures in raising two small children. First, off it’s actually an Australian TV show that Disney picked up for viewing in America and it reminds me of a cleaned-up version of the Simpsons. It’s seriously funny but always does a great job of passing along a valuable life lesson in the end.

Bandit Heeller is precisely the kind of dad I want to be when I grow. Equal parts goofball that never really grew up and is willing to play silly games and get into mischief while also being able to pepper in solid parenting, encouragement, and life lesson along the way to make sure they know they are loved and prepared to be the best possible versions of themselves they can be. I know your thinking to yourself seriously Brian a cartoon on Disney junior can be that deep or funny, My child likes Fancy Nancy or paw patrol and I’ve never once thought that any part of those shows was enjoyable. Don’t believe me? Go ahead and give it a watch. The first two stories are epically fun and the last one called Shadowlands is an excellent lesson in life.

In my little more than 5 years as a dad and the life lessons learned from Bandit aka Dad on bluey, I’ve decided I  want to be the cool dad for my kids. Not the cool dad that lets the kids drink and have parties at the house or the one that lets them run around like crazy whackado’s because coming down on your kids and disciplining them is just not the cool thing to do.

I want to be the dad that can take his kids rock climbing and bring their friends along and show off my abilities so they can brag about how strong their dad is. I want to be the dad that goes surfing with his kids and gets barrelled with all their friends watching. I want to be the house where the kids want to come and hang out because we’ve built an awesome backyard filled with things to eat and play with. I want to be the dad that laughs and jokes and has a good time so they want me to be around.

Because if they want me around and I get invited to do those things listed above I’m there to help, supervise and set an example, and maybe just maybe if I’m lucky figure out how to pass along a little life lesson in there while everyone’s having a great time. I know a time will come when they won’t want to hang out with me all the time but hopefully trying to be the cool dad will push that a couple more years into the future. And with that kind of time, I might be able to pass along just enough wisdom to keep them out of trouble and give them the ability to make choices filled with integrity when there isn’t an adult insight.

Like Bandit says in that first episode about making it too fun, ” Sorry, squirts. It’s a hard one to get right” but I figure if I’m there, we’re laughing and having a good time I must be doing an okay job.

Call to Action

  1. if you’ve got kids under the age of 7 or so watch some episodes of bluey with them. If you don’t it’s fine I watched that entire youtube video before typing this and everyone’s asleep in my house. It’s high-quality family entertainment, and everyone is sure to laugh. These are our favorites ones. The Dump, The pool, Shadowlands, and the Fairy Spell.
  2. Find a hobby that you and your kid can do together. I think it’s best if it’s something that you are both new to, this way you can grow and develop together and watch each other’s development. Might I suggest rock climbing/bouldering.

Ogres, Onions and Fathers Day…

One of my favorite movie quotes of all times comes from the original Shrek movie, its funny but has some deep-seeded wisdom lurking under the surface. Shrek and Donkey are walking through a garden discussing why Shrek didn’t torment a village, Shrek’s response is Ogres are a lot like onions, they have layers.

Ogres and people are very different, at least that’s what I’ve been able to infer from the movies, I’ve never met one in real life before. But just like onions and ogres, we do have a lot of layers. I’d be willing to bet that I could put my self in at least 2 dozen categories of groups I belong to. Like a surfer, aspiring farmer, runner, cook, husband, and father. Of all of my layers, those last two are at the core of the onion for me. They are why I go to work, eat healthily, exercise, and try to be the best version of myself I can be. I hope that I am better at those now then I was a year ago and that future me is better then I am today.

I am very grateful to have both my parents in our lives as they are fantastic parents and even better grandparents. They are a literal encyclopedia Britannica of wisdom on everything from parenting to building an outdoor shower. I’m 37 and I still need my parents for that wisdom and perhaps most importantly to watch our kids a few days a week so we don’t completely lose our minds as a result of working from home with an almost 2-year-old.

The most important thing I will do with my life is to be the gentle guiding influence that will hopefully turn my kids into kind and successful members of society as they grow and mature throughout their lives.

The best way I’ve come up with so far on how to accomplish that goal is to lead through example and take care of myself mentally and physically so I can be around for along time.

I want to take the next few minutes to implore you on the importance of taking care of yourself so we can be great fathers for many more decades to come. 

  1. If you haven’t been to the doctor to get a physical because your young and invisible in the past 5 years you need to stop and make that happen. In the spirit of brutal honesty, I belonged to that camp until about a year ago.  I went, it didn’t hurt and I felt grateful walking out of there after getting my lab results knowing that nothing unforeseen hadn’t been lurking under the surface.
  2. Take an inventory of what you eat this week, maybe even write it down. If you see something that surprises you next Sunday, pick that one thing and try to eat half as much the following week and in half again the following week. I truly believe that quitting cold turkey is bad for long term success.
  3. Pick a couple of bodyweight exercises like push-ups, squats, lunges, dips, crunches, planks you get the picture. Now pick a reasonable number of reps and days a week you will commit to putting in the work and start TODAY!!!

I promise you that if you put these three things into practice this year that you will be running circles around your kids come, fathers, day 2021.